New  generation Q writer, Brendan, shares his thoughts on growing up in a small country town and dealing with abuse and homphobia

In a small town of Tumut people know everyone's business before they know you sometimes. Being a gay male that has only just came out to my parents and siblings, I found it hard to keep it from them anymore when most people in the town already knew. My father was the stereo-typical homophobic male that played football, works at the mills with all the manly men and hated gays, my younger brother was the same. I didn't think that I could tell them that I was gay; I decided that I should tell someone it was eating away at me like maggots eating an old piece of meat. I told my sister first and she didn't care one bit: "You're my brother and I love you no matter what".
Then I told my mother and she said "I love you, you're my son and that doesn't change a thing". Then one night my mother called a family meeting. I knew that something was going to happen, my mother told my father and brother and they didn't care. Here are these two manly men that loved me for me.
But when I started to come out to the community they felt that I was different in some way and that I had changed. In one conversation, I lost my best friend and after I told her she said "People like you need to be taken out the back and be shown a bullet".
I work at a public school in Tumut and when they found out they were happy that there was a diverse rang of teachers that work at the school (not that I ever talk about it with the students). I also work at a pub in Tumut where I get called many names over the bar where I am the bar person or even the waiter, some customers do it in a very subtle way but I know that they are talking about me.

My boss asked me one night if the rumours were true and I answered yes. She was so happy that she said " If anyone tells you that you are different then that just shows you how shallow they are". To this day she is always there for me when I need her the most. My first shift at work the chef who was a lesbian knew that I was gay and she gave me a hug and said "I know that it's like to live in a small town where everyone hates you because of what you do behind closed doors.
I grew to love her, she was my friend she showed me the world outside of Tumut that people in bigger cities and towns really don't care but she soon left to go back home to America where I still keep in contact with her but its just not the same as having her here with me. Soon after she left I was too scared to go out on the town and have a good night out.

One of my friends that I went to younger school with moved back to Tumut after she was sent to drug rehab, we are now back as good friends still are to this day and I go out with her and my other friends. People don't say a word now, they don't care any more because I have talked to them shown them that I am not different and that I really am the same in everyway.

The people that don't like me for me still have a hard time stopping themselves from yelling things out to me in the street, egging my car and making fun of me to see if I will give a reaction. I am who I am and I am not changing for anyone, not people that live in this town and think that they get to say what the stereo-typical person should be.

Be true to yourself and show people out there that gay people are the same as straight people are and we don't bite (unless they ask us to), we work, we buy houses, we have partners and families we are the same, we just like the same sex. Let people see that you are you and not what they want you to be.

Your friends will be there for you what ever you need, that's why they are you friends not your enemy's. Your parent's, sister's, brothers and family will love you for you not because your gay but you're the flesh and blood you are their moon light and when the time comes for you to bring that special someone home to meet them they will love them as much as they love you.