GenQ - For the not so straight individual

The one thing I have learnt about clichés over the past few years and particularly since my break-up, is that they aren’t clichés for nothing. Just as stereotypes often hold at least a grain of truth, or eventually become self-fulfilling prophecies, clichés stem from the fact that a certain behaviour or response is predictable or unoriginal. Deep down I guess that’s another notch under the ‘we are all the same’ belt, because human emotions are universal and you have to wonder why so many of us react to things in such a similar manner. One such cliché that us humans have formed for ourselves is the rebound(s) after a serious relationship.

Whilst the Oxford dictionary describes a rebound to be an instance of recovering in value, amount or strength; the rebound im referring to can commonly be referred to as the next or a series of flings or relationships immediately after termination of a romantic relationship. A common feeling or lesson associated with the rebound is the need to feel wanted again or to be loved. We crave what we once had and we go looking for it in often strange places. When most of you think of a rebound, Im guessing you would imagine a one night stand, or a small period of more promiscuous behaviour than one would expect from that individual. In a way, we search for comfort at the time, only to wake up the next morning in an empty bed, aching for that special someone to be lying next to us with an affectionate smile. And I have to ask myself why we continue to do it, over and over again, when it is such an obvious bandaid and gives no lasting pleasure or happiness.

I guess its just part of who we are, same as the reason we keep getting into relationships in the first place, when we know how much it kills when they are over. Its because we crave human contact. Human interaction. We crave to love and to be loved in return. We are either searching to get that feeling back of being incredibly and totally in love, or we are searching for our first taste of it. Either way, we are all searching. The difference is, some people on the rebound like to have a little self-validation first and a little fun, which is harmless providing all parties know exactly what it is; a rebound. Im sure there are those of you out there who choose or have chosen to deal with your loneliness and pain by jumping straight into something else to cover the loss. This may indeed cause problems further down the track. In my opinion however, this doesn’t fool you anymore than one night stands do. I’d even be willing to bet that the other person in the equation recognises the nature of the relationship, but may just be that much more desperate to go along with it.

What ends up happening either way, is a repeat of past mistakes, because they are never really resolved. And we all know what happens to the bottle of unresolved issues, when its closed with a lid that just doesn’t fit right. The lid may hold for a while, but eventually after the pressure continues to build, you start to get leakage, and eventually a small explosion, depending on the bottle size and toughness of the material used :P The point im trying to make is, its called a rebound for a reason. However, if the rebound ends up becoming something more, then its more like a quick fix than a period of healing. And a bandaid, just won't cover it.