Everyone says that they do not want to play games, but everyone is secretly trying out to figure out their next move. My friend Magda is an avid game player. “Games are the way I keep romance alive and interest in the guy,” she says with a cheeky smile.

There’s the I like you…I like you NOT game. Rules are simple: always seem less interested in your opponent (the guy) than he is interested in you. This game is usually played at the beginning of any relationship. Deep down, you want to spend every waking minute with your new love…but you are too afraid to seem psycho or co-dependant. So the game becomes about who blinks first…and says the L word. You win if they fall first…..but you could risk loosing the guy by not showing any interest.

Another game is playing hard to get…when you delay going to the next level. Magda never puts out for the first few weeks. I used to wait until at least the second date. You can give them a preview, no need to play prude. Building up the sexual tension can lead to some fun sexual games. Many people play games when it comes to sex…but that is for another post!

Then there is the love see saw…you may have played with a see saw when you were young. If one person pushes down, the other person goes up. In a relationship this works with one person chasing and the other person running away. In a past relationship, I kept wanting for this guy to chase me…to be calling me…emailing me and paying attention. I was the one chasing him …until I learn the reverse psychology game. I stopped calling him…and chasing him. He started calling me and asking what was wrong….I learned that if you want a guy to chase you…you have to play it cool and stop chasing him.

Some guys play the hot or cold game. One minute they want you to be your boyfriend…the next minute they are flirting with your friends. You never know what the deal is with the guy…and all he seems to end up playing with is your emotions and your heart.

Lastly are the one date players. They like to take you on a perfect date and give you the impression that there is potential for a relationship. They say the right things and then…game over…they never call you back. There is no closure..and you never find out what you did wrong. I once went out with this guy who kept making future plans, insisted on meeting my friends (on the first date) and never called me back or took my calls. He was just playing mind games.

What games do you play?

Tags: relationships