It was my mother who first made me aware of the concept that whilst I though some of my friends actually cared about me, part of the reason they hung out with me was because they needed someone to witness their lives and that's what I did until I realised I had better things to do than just be an audience for them.

I have always thought that life is but a script and we are its players - its all pre-written, the catch? We only learn the script as we go and although the endings and outcomes have already been predetermined, we don't learn of them until present themselves on the path we chose to wander through life on.

Along the lines of the famous Shakespearean quote, "All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players" I do believe that there is such thing as fate but only to the extent that it is, in actual fate, merely our choices - whether they are right or wrong - which determine where we go in life. Life is a game; a puzzle; a mystery; a labyrinth; a locked door for which we have to find the key. Sometimes little thought goes into our actions and that can sometimes take us to undesirable places.

"We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet... I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day."

- Beverly Clark (Susan Sarandon, 'Shall We Dance')

My advice to you: take the time to truly consider all aspects, implications and outcomes of your dilemma or situation before taking any action, keeping in mind that the outcome will be of your conjurance - they don't say 'the ball is in your court' for nothing. We choose where we go in life - don't ever leave it to chance or 'it wasn't meant to be' throw you off, things may happen for a reason, and some things are simply out of your hands, but that should never stop you from careful consideration in all aspects of your life.

A friend once described one's impact in the world in terms of a ripple in a body of water - what you do will cause a ripple spreads and affects something else - you may think that your impact or input on things is irrelevant - you may think its you, but seriously if everyone thought about doing things individually, that's a lot of people making an effort to make a difference.

I must admit, I went a little off track but still, sometimes witness others lives is important, such as watching children grow up or encouraging friends or loved ones to excel at their chosen hobby or what-have-you.

What I am really trying to say is; believe in yourself enough that you value your right to do what you want and not what others want, within reason. Enjoy life without simply being someone's audience - that is unless you are a rock star, actor/ress or celebrity or gets off by having people swoon, fawn and obsess over you - we need someone to laugh at, PUH-LEASE....

Tags: friendship, relationships