Have you ever seen a break up as only a temporary glitch? Did somewhere in the back of your mind lurk the idea that you would get back with your sweetheart eventually, despite the fact that they have moved on and are with someone else? Have you hoped that your sweetheart felt the same, but really you had no idea?

I have.

For two years I was hung up over the idea that Nikita and I would be getting back together. Some would say that three months isn’t really suffice enough to know that you love someone enough to be with them for the rest of your life (or at least think that you do), sometimes you just know or have a feeling that the person you are with is the one. 

Sometimes you get it right, sometimes you don’t. 

But when you spend two whole years convinced that somehow you would miraculously get back together and everything would be peachy again…at some point you really need to step back and say ‘If we were to going get back together, we would have done so already’. 

Three months into my first functional relationship since Nikita and I broke up, and getting back with her is the farthest thing from my mind. 
 
Nothing heals the last one, like the next.

How true those words are.

I have only now just considered how it is that I am going to tell Nikita that I’ve moved on when a week prior to this relationship starting we had discussed getting back together. Subsequently I made my choice to move forward. Why back track, when you have a positive future with someone new to look forward to…?

New and shiny always seems more appealing than old and dysfunctional.

How does one make progression without sacrifice?

Experience true and lasting love without leaving behind their past disappointments?

Simple.

You take everything new on its own merits. Keeping in mind that there is a first time for everything.

A first time to fall in love, a first time to fall into lasting love and a first time to do all the things you’ve always wanted to … a first time to be truly happy.
 

No complications. That’s what we all want isn’t it? A stress-free, easy relationship with someone who is fun to be around…and who loves you as much as you love them? Had you have asked me whether love like this existed about a year ago I would have told you ‘yes’ but only with Nikita…how much has changed since then!

It is truly amazing the sort of impact a positive attitude can have on one’s life, especially one that is the result of an amazing relationship. My girlfriend recently told me about this ‘new horizons’ attitude she had developed in the past 18 months and how she was slowly throwing out things from her past in order to make way for new things. I tried doing that myself and, you know what? It truly works, what a weight is lifted from your shoulders when you throw out old love letters that used to only make you cry when you read them.

What I am trying to get at is this – you must be willing to employ the virtue of optimism in all aspects of your life in order to experience the wide array of wonderful life experiences that fate, destiny or simply your own choices, have in store for you.

Allow the idea of great love, that promotion, your dream job…whatever it is that you really want in life…keep your eyes firmly on the goal and ensure that you employ a positive and optimistic attitude at all times and you will welcome these things into your life. For it is only when you lose sight of the goal that the obstacles appear.

Don’t give up; there is someone out there for you. You may not have met them yet, or if you have…hold onto them. There may be plenty more fish in the sea, but when you have your bird (or lad), have faith, good things come to those who (have)wait(ed).

Tags: lesbian, relationships